Howard Freese, Certified Financial Planner at Old Mutual Personal Finance

Fatherhood doesn’t just shift your priorities – it turns your financial world on its head. Overnight, instinctive spending is replaced by hard choices, and personal freedom gives way to shared responsibility. Without a plan, the pressure can feel overwhelming – but with the right financial roadmap, this massive life detour becomes manageable.

This is according to Howard Freese, Certified Financial Planner at Old Mutual Personal Finance, who says new fathers are often caught off guard by how quickly the pressure mounts. “There’s this moment when you realise, you’re not just responsible for yourself anymore — and it changes the way you think about every rand you spend.”

The moment you realise you're expecting a baby, your financial responsibilities begin to shift. Maternity leave, paternity leave, and the looming list of baby-related costs – from nappies and wipes to unexpected medical bills – quickly come into focus as new financial priorities begin to take shape.

Freese says many dads are driven by the urge to provide more than they had growing up. “You go from planning your finances around one person to managing a budget stretched across ten or twenty new priorities – all to give your child the best possible start.”

But that shift can also bring a wave of uncertainty — especially in the months leading up to the birth. “You start asking: how much income are we going to lose if my partner goes on maternity leave? Will my paternity leave be paid? And if not, how am I going to cover the shortfall?”

Planning Is Not Optional

Freese likens the mental load of new fatherhood to a plate of spaghetti — tangled, messy, and overwhelming. “A financial adviser can help bring perspective when emotions take over.”

“You need to speak to someone who can help you make sense of it all. It’s easy to overspend because you want to give your child everything. But that can come at the cost of ignoring essentials like life cover, education savings, or even food and clothing in the event of a crisis.”

He adds that open, realistic conversations about needs versus wants are essential. “Get professional help. A financial adviser is like a doctor for your money. They’ll take your concerns, your goals, and your current situation, and map it out into a workable plan.”

“Fatherhood may bring sleepless nights, but your finances shouldn’t be one of them,” concludes Freese. “With planning, the transition from individual to family-focused budgeting doesn’t have to be a crisis – it can be a strategy that becomes your saving grace.”

Freese’s Top Practical Tips for New Dads

• Protect your family if you’re not around: Make sure you have adequate life cover in place to provide for your partner and child if something happens to you. This includes covering school fees, maintenance, and daily living expenses.
• Don’t sacrifice your retirement: It’s tempting to pause or cut your retirement contributions to free up income, but Freese warns this can have long-term consequences. If needed, he suggests reducing your contributions – but never cancelling them entirely.
• Start short- and long-term savings plans: Short-term savings help cover ongoing expenses like nappies, clothing, seasonal medical bills, and emergencies when medical aid runs out. Long-term savings fund your child’s education, future home, or even dream holidays to create lasting memories.
• Budget for joy – but set boundaries: It’s natural to want to give your child the best — but without a plan, the pink unicorns and themed birthday parties can crowd out essentials. A sound financial plan builds in joy and leisure without undermining security.
• Plan as a team: Whether you're in a partnership or divorced but still co-parenting or sharing responsibilities with another contributing adult, Freese recommends aligning on financial goals. Shared budgeting and regular reviews with a financial adviser help reduce conflict and build financial stability.
• Make sure your plan can adapt: Life changes — retrenchments, new jobs, economic shocks — and your financial plan should be flexible enough to keep up. Build in buffers and revisit your plan regularly with your adviser.